Soylent Green is Sustainably-Raised People

So I've been moving further and further into this strange, semi-justifiable food-fascist bubble, and it's really started to color the way I see things. Since the vast majority of my groceries come from my CSA, the Union Square greenmarket, or Chelsea Market, my occasional trips to regular -- or even bougie -- grocery stores have turned me into the sort of person, usually a recent arrival from a Communist country, who shuffles around awkwardly in the produce aisle, baffled by the phenomenon of choice.

Except so: I write this as I try, as I have been trying for the last 13 minutes, to stir chocolate-flavored soy protein isolate into water in a manner such that it doesn't clump. This appears to be well-nigh impossible, or at least out of my reach. Why am I drinking chocolate-flavored soy protein isolate? Because, well, recently-acquired weightlifting obsession = massive, gigantic protein needs. Would it be delightful to be able to fulfill my protein needs with trust-fund chicken from Violet Hill? Of course. Can I afford that? No. Is chocolate-flavored Soylent Green preferable in my mind to non-trust-fund chicken not from Violet Hill or similar? Hate to say it, but yes.  And so chocolate-flavored Soylent Green it is.

Though this office is a weird place to be drinking chocolate-flavored Soylent Green. I'm debating a brown paper bag for my next round.

Rupa Bhattacharya, Culinary Writer
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