For the clams: Bring the wine and 1/2 cup water to a boil in a large saucepan, stir in the littleneck clams, cover and steam until the clams open, about 5 minutes. Discard any clams that do not open. Remove the clams with a slotted spoon and place in a bowl to cool.
Bring the broth back to a boil, add the cockles and cook until open, about 5 minutes. Discard any cockles that do not open. Remove with a slotted spoon to a separate bowl (these will be used in their shells as a garnish).
Strain the clam broth through a mesh strainer lined with cheesecloth into a bowl. Set aside.
Remove the littleneck clams from their shells and coarsely chop.
For the potato: Put the potato in a small saucepan, cover with cold water, add 1 tablespoon salt and bring to a boil. Cook until a paring knife inserted into the center meets with some resistance, about 15 minutes. Drain and let cool slightly, about 10 minutes.
Heat the butter and oil in a cast-iron or nonstick pan until it begins to shimmer. Cut the potato into a 1/2-inch dice. Add the potato to the pan, season with salt and pepper and cook until lightly golden brown on all sides.
For the bacon: Heat the oil in a small pan over medium heat. Add the bacon and cook until golden brown and the fat has rendered, about 10 minutes. Remove the bacon to a plate lined with paper towels.
For the fried okra: Heat the oil in a small saucepan until it begins to shimmer. While the oil heats, season the okra with salt and pepper, dredge in the cornmeal. Fry in the oil, in batches if needed, until golden brown and just tender, about 4 minutes. Remove to a plate lined with paper towels and season with salt.
For the chowder: Heat the oil in a large saucepan over medium heat. Add the shallots, carrot and celery and cook until soft, about 4 minutes. Add the anchovy and chile flakes and cook for 1 minute. Add the tomato paste and cook for 2 minutes, stirring constantly.
Add the clam juice and reserved clam broth and bring to a boil. Reduce the heat to low, add the reserved littleneck clams and cook for 10 minutes. Add the parsley, oregano and thyme and cook for 1 minute. Whisk in the creme fraiche and lemon zest until smooth. Season with salt and pepper to taste.
Ladle the soup into bowls, top with some of the potatoes, bacon, okra and reserved cockles. Garnish with parsley leaves.