Low Country Shrimp and Grits with Stewed Tomatoes

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2 cups 2-percent milk

Coarse kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper

1 cup stone-ground grits

1 tablespoon olive oil

1 medium onion, coarsely chopped

3 cloves garlic, finely chopped

One 28-ounce can low-sodium whole tomatoes, coarsely chopped, juice reserved

2 bay leaves, preferably fresh

1 pinch ground cayenne pepper or to taste

24 large fresh shrimp, peeled and deveined (tails left on)

2 tablespoons chopped fresh parsley, plus more for garnish

2 tablespoons freshly grated Parmigiano-Reggiano, plus more for garnish

1 tablespoon unsalted butter