Hickory Daiquiri Dock — Off the Shelf

Squeeze happy hour in right after bedtime with nursery rhyme-inspired cocktails garnished with a twist of humor in Tim Federle's new book, Hickory Daiquiri Dock.
Hickory Daiquiri Dock

Tim Federle, the mixologist mastermind behind Tequila Mockingbird, is back and quippier than ever in his new book for new parents, Hickory Daiquiri Dock. Squeeze happy hour in right after bedtime with these nursery rhyme-inspired cocktails, garnished with a twist of humor. All your kids’ favorites are present and accounted for, from Rocks-N-Rye, Baby and Wee Willie Whiskey to Mary Had a Little Dram and London Binge, I’m Falling Down. Give the Bloody Mary, Quite Contrary a try for yourself (recipe for you to try at home after the link).

Unlike parenthood, the rules for enjoying a refreshing cocktail are simple. “Rule No. 1: Don’t serve anything alcoholic in a sippy cup! Rule No. 2: Drink what you like and don’t stress out too much about rules. Rule No. 3: make fresh ice. You don’t want your cocktail to taste like a frozen hot dog.” The drinks are simple, designed to be mixed quickly and deliciously. Federle candidly declares, “If a drink requires more than, say, three alcoholic components (I’m looking at you, Long Island iced tea), but it doesn’t taste alcoholic at all (I’m glaring at you, Long Island iced tea), grab a beer and hide in the attic.”

Hickory Daiquiri Dock

It’s not easy to riff off childhood favorites with such a clean balance of wit and punch, but Federle nails it. “The biggest challenge was coming up with puns that immediately evoke the original source — I wanted readers to see Bloody Mary, Quite Contrary and immediately know which classic nursery rhyme it was referencing … I wanted Hickory Daiquiri Dock to be funny and fresh.” He adds, “My favorite recipe is Rum-A-Dub-Dub, a piping-hot beverage which plays off the mild mayhem that bath time can easily descend into.” The book is a joy to read and would make the perfect holiday gift for any parents (new and frazzled or seasoned pros) that you know. As an added bonus, there’s a new-parent drinking game tucked away in the back, because laughter and a good cocktail are, after all, the best medicine. You can order your copy  here.

Bloody Mary, Quite Contrary
(Mary Mary, Quite Contrary)
Bloody Mary, quite contrary,
How does your baby grow?
With crappy smells and happy yells,

And a smile that makes you glow.

5 ounces tomato juice
2 ounces vodka
2 dashes Worcestershire sauce
1 teaspoon horseradish
1/2 teaspoon wasabi
Pinch of pepper

Feeling a little rundown, zonked out and stuffed up? If your baby’s diapers don’t clear your sinuses, this kicky classic certainly will. Fill a highball glass with ice, add all the ingredients, and garnish with a silly straw.

Better yet, pop some vitamin C, split a pot of tea, and go admire that ridiculously adorable baby of yours.

Recipe reprinted with permission from Hickory Daiquiri Dock© 2014 by Tim Federle, Running Press, a member of the Perseus Books Group.

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