Neiman Marcus' $66 Collard Greens Are All Sold Out

DebbiSmirnoff, DebbiSmirnoff
“Needless Markup” indeed. Neiman Marcus — which offers on its website such necessities as a private airplane entirely covered in rose gold for $1,500,000 (such a deal!) and a “curated collection” of 36 children’s books for $100,000 (Caldecott winners, but still …) — is not known for its low prices. Yet the luxury department store recently may have set a new bar for price-tag overreach by offering collard greens, that staple of down-home Southern cuisine, for (hang onto your wallet) $66, plus $15.50 shipping.
For that low, low price, you’ll get four 12-ounce trays of “fully cooked and frozen” veggies “seasoned with just the right amount of spices and bacon,” ready to heat and serve to eight to 10 diners. (Make your own collard greens with these recipes.)
Not surprisingly, social media was not having it.
“Anybody who would buy collard greens from NM deserves to pay $66,” tweeted an indignant @Texasbec214.
@ThomasLS took it one step further, quipping, “If you buy collard greens from Neiman Marcus, you will not get into Heaven.”
Meanwhile, The Root told Neiman Marcus, via Twitter, that “$66 #gentrifiedgreens better taste like unicorn tears and Prince’s bath water.”
Whatever the fancy holiday veggies taste like, anyone just finding out about them now may never know. The pricey collard greens, roundly mocked as they were, have completely sold out on Neiman Marcus’ website.
No worries, though. The department store’s site has a few other recommendations for hungry shoppers: Can it interest you in a baked bean medley, for eight to 10 people, for $80, plus $18 shipping? Or perhaps a broccoli cheese casserole, for four to six people, for $65.00, plus $15.50 shipping?
You gotta eat something on your $1.5 million rose-gold-covered private plane, one supposes.
Photo: iStock