Ice-T Can No Longer Say He Hasn’t Tried a Bagel

Or coffee, which he says it is "not what I expected."

Assorted variety of different flavored freshly baked bagels in a full frame background on burlap viewed from above in an abstract pattern


Assorted variety of different flavored freshly baked bagels in a full frame background on burlap viewed from above in an abstract pattern

Photo by: Ozgur Coskun

Ozgur Coskun

Remember the brouhaha (should we call it a “brew-haha”?) on Twitter the other week about Ice-T declaring that he had never eaten a bagel or drunk coffee?

Well, what may have seemed like a momentary amusement to some of us and a moral outrage to others looked like a marketing opportunity for the dating app Coffee Meets Bagel. Of course it did.

The cutely named company created a video of the actor and rap musician trying black coffee and a bagel with cream cheese for the first time, because, it explained, “As Coffee Meets Bagel, we knew it was our duty to give the people what they wanted.”

Very kind of them.

In the video, posted to YouTube, Ice-T asserts that his claim to never have tried either coffee or bagels was “the truth,” and marvels that Coffee Meets Bagel offered to bring both comestibles over to his home for him to try.

“How nice is that?” he asks.

Answer: Yes, very nice. And the generous check we assume they also brought him is probably even nicer.

Cut to – Ice-T taking what he says is his first-ever sip of coffee. He swishes it around in his mouth and muses, “OK, it’s not what I expected.”

After a brief pause to consider further, the thoughts apparently swirling around his head like the fish in the tank in the foreground, Ice-T declares that coffee “tastes like water, with something – another taste kicked in later.”

Then he adds, with apparent distaste, “This is my first and I can pretty much tell you this’ll be the last time I’ll ever drink black coffee. Why would you do that?”

Next, Ice-T tries a plain bagel with a shmear of cream cheese. “I’m from the West Coast, and it always just looked like an unsweetened doughnut to me,” he shares, marveling over bagel hand injuries as he struggles to slice it. So, you know, he’s approaching it with a certain degree of caution.

And the taste?

“Ready? Drumroll, please,” he says.

He bites. He chews.

“It’s not bad,” he declares. “It has a different consistency than a doughnut, but it’s not bad.”

After taking just one bite, Ice-T says he feels as if he “just ate a loaf of bread.”

“People eat this whole thing?” he asks what we can only assume is some off-screen bagel-eating expert.

But Ice-T is not yet finished. As a bonus, he’s also ready to sample and weigh in on a bagel not only with cream cheese, but with lox as well.

“One of my Jewish homeboys told me this is a super-classic New York Jewish situation going on and that lox is salmon or fish, I think,” he says. (Don’t look, tank fishies!)

The bite, the chew.

“You’ve got to have some strong jaws,” Ice-T says, still chewing. “Your teeth better be in check. You got any caps on your teeth, anything, that’s all gone, Jack. Fillings come out your mouth …”

At the end of the video, which has racked up more than 193K views on Ice-T’s Twitter page alone, the star sits with a nice creamy-looking iced coffee and egg-and-meat bagel sandwich and puts in a plug for Coffee Meets Bagel. Having monetized his original tweet – and who knows how much he raked in for this -- he looks like the cat who ate the canary.

Hope his caps and fillings are secure.

Photo: iStock

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