Take Your Ranch-Dipped Pizza to the Next Level

Hidden Valley has made a pizza dipping ranch sauce that tastes like ranch-dipped pizza. (Whoa.)

We all know that ranch salad dressing has its avid fans and its equally passionate detractors. Now it has a new format for those in the former category, at least, to get excited about. Hidden Valley Ranch has just introduced a new line of ranch dipping sauces, available in three flavors.

Zestier Ranch features twice as much garlic and onion for “twice the taste,” according to Hidden Valley. Bold Buffalo offers an “intense” combination of buttermilk, red peppers, onion and vinegar, its product page promises. But it’s the third variety that is arguably the most intriguing and definitely the most meta, especially if you happen to be the kind of person who likes to dip your pizza in ranch dressing. (No judgment.)

Hidden Valley’s Ranch-Dipped Pizza Flavor combines the tastes of pizza and ranch dressing in one, so if you dip your pizza in it, you’re basically dipping your pizza in the flavor of pizza. Which if you think too long about it may make your brain hurt a little.

The site recommends using the pizza-dipped-in-ranch-flavored dipping sauce with crudités, chicken wings, tacos, casseroles, fries, nuggets, bread, crackers, chips and a host of other items in addition to pizza, noting, “the dipping possibilities are endless.”

While the Hidden Valley website directs those who want to purchase the Zestier Ranch or Bold Buffalo dipping sauces to HEB or Meijer, it offers the Ranch-Dipped Pizza Flavor sauce ($3.49 for a 12-ounce squeeze bottle) directly via the Hidden Valley website’s Ranch Shop. There it appears alongside other products like ranch-proud T-shirts and hoodies, sweatpants, caps, ranch dressing bottle and shaker holiday ornaments, a ranch flask, and, perhaps best of all, an inflatable bottle of ranch dressing. (Measuring 6.5 feet, it comes complete with “complete with a blower and tethers” so your giant ranch bottle will stay right where you put it.)

Or, no, maybe best of all is the ranch dressing fountain, which stands 18 inches tall and includes a stainless steel heated basin you can turn on and off.

Hidden Valley says the “cascading fountain” will “turn your Ranch fantasy into a reality” and “impress family and friends.” And if you fill it with Ranch-Dipped Pizza Flavor Dipping Sauce and surround it with dippable pizza slices, well, you got yourself one heck of a party, ranch fans.

Photo courtesy of @hidden.valley

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