Make the salsa: Heat a large cast-iron skillet over high heat. Add the tomatoes, jalapeno and garlic and cook, turning, until charred, 8 to 10 minutes. Transfer to a large bowl. Add the onion to the skillet and cook, turning, until charred, 5 minutes. Add to the bowl, cover with plastic wrap and let cool.
Meanwhile, warm the pulled pork in a saucepan or the microwave. Pour off the excess liquid, then set the pork aside to cool.
Squeeze the tomatoes to remove the excess liquid; transfer to a food processor. Stem and peel the jalapeno; remove the seeds for less heat. Add the jalapeno to the food processor. Peel the garlic cloves and add to the food processor along with the onion, cilantro leaves, chipotle and adobo sauce; puree. Set aside.
Mash the avocados with the juice of 1/2 lime in a bowl with a fork; season with salt.
To assemble, spread the refried beans in a 2-quart glass bowl or trifle dish. Spread the pulled pork over the beans. Top with the salsa, then the mashed avocados. Spread the sour cream over the avocados and sprinkle with the cheese.
Toss the cabbage with the pickled jalapenos, the juice of the remaining 1/2 lime and the chopped cilantro; pile on top of the cheese. Serve with tortilla chips.