In a small sauce pan, bring the milk to a boil. Stir in the farina and cook 5 minutes, stirring often. Take off the heat and stir in the nuts, 1/4 cup of the butter and sugar. Set aside to cool. Butter the bottom of a walled 8 by 8-inch square pan. Cut the phyllo sheets in half, to fit the pan. Lay 2 sheets in the pan then brush with some remaining melted butter, coating the phyllo completely. Repeat 6 more times, making a layer 12 sheets thick. Spread the nut filling evenly over the phyllo then cover with 12 more sheets, buttering every other sheet. Cover and chill for 30 minutes.
Using a sharp knife cut the phyllo in 1 1/2-inch diamond shapes. Bake in a preheated 375-degree F oven for 20 minutes until light golden brown. Remove from the oven and spoon any leftover melted butter over the top of the phyllo. Reduce the oven temperature to 300 degrees and continue baking until deep golden, about 1 hour. Remove from the oven and let cool for 10 minutes. Tilt the pan to allow the butter to drain to one side. Remove 1 piece of baklava and let sit tilted 30 minutes. Spoon out excess butter.
Run a sharp knife along the baklava's score lines to loosen. Heat the bottom of the baklava up on a griddle or move it over a gas burner. Ladle the hot syrup over the cut lines of the baklava and shake the tray to loosen the pieces. It may sizzle slightly. Drizzle a bit of syrup over the top. You can drain it again, letting it tilt for 2 hours. Then let it sit overnight.
Combine all the syrup ingredients and bring to a boil. Simmer then for 10 minutes.